Noisy laptop … kicked out of the libray

Today, the Nazi-librarians at the Broward County’s North Lauderdale branch hovered over me as I read my e-mail and complained that my trusted old Toshiba Portege laptop computer was too noisy, and that I should turn it off, as the noise could be heard all the way at the entrance to the library.

This, while I sat at the back of the building checking my e-mailed job listings.

For some two months now, I have been occasionally using the wifi service at the library branch and have observed that the old ladies of the library are a very zealous lot, when it comes to their fiefdom and their wards.

On any given day, along with a Broward County Sheriff’s officer, who is stationed in the library — the book-patrol crew walks back and forth looking at people, people’s laptop screens, desktop computers, etc.

They look at and for, every conceivable infraction of some unknown personal standard.

Mostly, they look for teens talking on their cell phones, chewing gum and basically messing around.

This I applaud. After all it is a place of study.

However, on this day, the seemingly head honcho, Joan and a couple of her cohorts had decided that the normal sounds of a laptop computer was too much for them and my fellow library users, and that I must turn off my laptop and use one of their desktop computers or leave their domain.

Joan, who was identified by her name badge, and accompanied by another library worker, was insistent that I turn off my computer, so she could make an assessment as to what was the source of the computer noise(s).

I told her OK; but she would have to do that act herself. She, a person who intended on finding the noise(s) source and a computer technical whiz, could not in the end, figure out how to use a mouse pointer nor how to turn off the machine.

Of course, I did not help out.

However, the two librarians insisted that I had to leave the room, and upon asking if I was being asked to leave the library, the now puzzled paired, looked at each other, then me and said that they would try to find me another room, somewhere in the building.

I told them that since I was not doing anything illegal, bothering anyone, not creating a scene — at least until they ridiculously approached me with this stupidity — that I would continue and not leave, but I quickly got the felling that they were about to call the police on me, when they turned their backs and walked away from me. I finished sending an e-mail to the local newspaper and departed the facilities, due to two Nazi-librarians in North Lauderdale, Florida.

I wondered upon my departure, if I could or would have been arrested by the Broward County Sheriff department for refusing to turn off my “noisy” laptop computer at the library.